LOVE IS JEALOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MAYBE NOT................

“Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.”

1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

Am I feeling all lovey dovey today? In fact, NO.  Just remembered something from a while back. Well, it's nothing but one of those regular arguments between a friend and I. Hope you remember the 3 am friend I had told you about. Yeah, I also remember telling you that we talk about all kinds of things. Our conversations are not limited to a particular topic or anything. It ranges, from everything to everything. Sometimes they can be really boring, other times however we do talk about some serious issues and something interesting.

This happened the other night, we happened to bump into Love. Well, as you know it, we have different opinion (Remember the North Pole, South Pole thing?????). We agreed on the importance and the value of Love however could not get to the same page when we spoke about what Love is. Love is a lot of things and we agreed on most, however when it came to Love being JEALOUS or not. We could not agree. Well, I belong to the school which believes that love is Jealous and she, to the school which believes that it is not.

Me: What do you think then, is love jealous.

She: No. It is not.

Me: Why?

She: Have you not read the bible. 1^st Corinthians to be precise.

Me: Ummmmm..... Yeah, I did.

She: Then what does it say.

Me: Ummmmmm.... It talks about Love and what Love is.

She: Exactly and doesn't it say that It is everything but Jealous.

Me: Yeah, it is. I however don't believe in that. I believe it is.

She: Well, if your Love is true and pure then it is not.

Me: How can you say that? There are different types of people with different thoughts about it.

She: This is how it is and this is what I believe.

Me: Okay let me ask you what the greatest love is.

She: It’s God’s love. (The answer came after a long thought though!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Me: So, you think and believe that his love is the purest.

She: Yeah.

Me: Oh, Well..... Let me ask you. You say God loves us and he gets jealous if we worship other Gods, right!!!!!!!!!!!! Doesn't that mean that it is jealous?

She: I knew you were going to say that and I was kinda prepared for it. Well, that's his Love and the jealousy because we were not faithful.

Me: Exactly. Not everyone is faithful in this world. I can Love someone who is not, I can Love her without trusting and I can Love her and still be jealous when she talks or goes out with someone else.

She: You can't Love someone without trusting them and jealousy, if you are jealous that means you don't Love her. Love is way beyond all these feelings.

Me: I don't believe that. I think Love is jealous but Lust is not.

She: That's not true. Just because you get jealous, you can't say that.

Me: Oh, well yeah I can. See, if I have a girlfriend who talks a lot to someone particular, goes out with him and is close with him. Then I am bound to be jealous. That's because I Love her.

She: Mmmmm...Hmmmmm.... Go on.

Me: And if I don't care what she does behind my back and who she meets and where she goes and still kisses me every time we meet and I am okay with. Then I don't think that's Love. It's lust.

She: You are impossible.

Me: Yeah and you are the best. You'd be one cool girlfriend (Note the sarcasm!!!!!!!!!!!)

She: Shut Up. (In a bit miffed tone)

Me: See, that is what I am talking about. If you love someone and if that person gets a bit too close to someone else then you are ought to feel jealous. Because you love them.

She: If that happens then I would just let him to go her. What’s the point of feeling jealous if they don’t care about it.

Me: That’s where you are wrong. When you love someone, you don’t give them a condition to love you back.

She: You are being bookish.

Me: I am not. This is bookish but true okay. Because you see, I will feel jealous if that happens and I am not going to let her go. I will try my best to bring her close again, while jealousy will deffo be there.

She: What if you fail?

Me: If I fail then I can at least tell myself that I did my best. And I don’t believe in “If you love someone just set them free. If they come back they are yours and if they don’t they were never meant to be”. I rather believe in “If you love someone then just hold on to them so tight that they cannot get away.”

She: Yeah, right. I can see that. What if they still want to get away from you?

Me: Then it will be a bye-bye. If that happens then I will not even take her if she ever comes back. Once I say it’s the end, then it is the end. Period.

She: I don’t know about that. But I still believe that Love is not jealous. I think no one will ever be able to make me believe that it is.

Me: See, that’s what I am trying to say. You believe that love is not jealous because it’s written in the Bible. I am not getting into any kind of blasphemy or something. But just think. God himself is jealous when we drift away from him. Then if he says love is not jealous, than in my view that is Hypocrisy.

She: No it’s not. He is jealous because he loves us a lot.

Me: That’s what my whole point is. See, I love someone a lot and if I see her with someone else, being comfortable with someone else, then I would certainly feel jealous. I think every lover would feel the same.

By this time I thought I had made my point quite clear and for the first time, I was kinda sensing a victory in the argument as well.

She: No. I won’t. I don’t just believe in it because it’s written in the bible. But this is how a true love supposed to be.

Me: I am not sure if I’ll ever be able to convince you or not. But I do believe that love is jealous, if not much then a bit.

She: No. It is not and it will never be.

Me: Okay, let's cut this out. As it is, we don't seem to be at the same page and there will be no ending to the argument.

That's how we ended the conversation. Then we proceeded to talk about something else. As I always said, everyone is entitled to their opinion and I respect that. The least I expect from them is to respect mine as well. Just a bit of thought, what she said might be true and that's how real Love should be. Then again I think, if that were supposed to be the way, then why do we all get jealous (Oh, well.... bar a few people). Even our God feels jealousy.

A lot would agree with me and a lot will not. In my view however, if you love someone then jealousy should be there, so does possessiveness. If these things are not there in a relationship then I think you don’t value your partner much. That’s just my thoughts however; no one needs to agree to it.

Love is jealous?????? Hmmmmm…. Maybe not. I leave that to your discretion.

That’s it for now. Will see you very soon. Till then, take care and stay safe.

Adios!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S.- Love is jealous.

AHMEDABAD DIARIES: CHAPTER VIII A RED WEEKEND IN A HOTEL.

It's been quite a good experience so far. Though we talk a lot about getting a cable connection and agree on it sometimes, but it never materialized. Reason. Well, the boss always agrees only to change his mind later. It has happened a lot of times and I am pretty much annoyed by it now. I have finally decided I am not going to say anything anymore and if I want something I will just try to find a way without even putting them to any kind of discomfort or without even bothering them.

So, it was weekend again and other roommates back home. It was just the "Boss and I at home, Liverpool playing a crucial match and I really wanted to see it. I gave one last try to convince the boss for the cable connection without any positive affect. So, I decided if this is how it's going to be. So, be it. So, I booked a room in a hotel for a night. Well, yeah, it seemed like a waste of money and if I tell my parents about it, they will not be very pleased with it. I am sure, that however needed to be done. I mean, come on. I can't stay with him alone for two days. That's the first reason. I wanted to watch Liverpool match. That's second and the thid, I was a bit pissed with him and I did not wanted to talk to him. I would have had I stayed but I really did not wanted to piss myself more. So, this seemed like the best idea.

So, right after work I called the hotel to check if there is any room vacant. There was none. But the reception guy knew me (After all I stayed there for a month). So, I requested him to arrange for it. So, he did. All set to check in. I went home toget my night clothes. Boss, was already waiting for me.

Boss: When should we go to have dinner.

Me: Oh, I am sorry, I will have to go to my relatives house. I will be staying there.

Boss: Okay, it's fine. When will you be back.

Me: Maybe Monday morning or Sunday night. Cant say anything about it now. But I will let you know.

Boss: Okay, let me know. And yeah, are you going home for Christmas.

Me: Yeah, I am. But not sure when will I leave.

Boss: Okay, do let me know about it as well. If you leave we'd need to cancel your tiffin.

Me: Okay, once I get the ticket, I will for sure. (I am a bit annoyed by now!!!!!!!!)

Boss: Okay, and what about your Christmas party.

Now, this is too much. I mean, I hardly know him. I would have never thought about it and asking is just way out of line. I was shocked to hear that. I wanted to tell him "I am going to a hotel to stay a night there all because of you." I would said it as well, but then someone had taken a promise that I will keep my cool no matter what. So I did.

Me: I don't know about that sir. We'll decide that once I come back.

Boss: Yes. Decide fast okay. Its your festival and a party is a must.

Me: Yeah sure. Don't worry about it. I will.

So I packed my clothes and left. He asked to drop me, but I said it's okay as my peon was waiting for me downstairs. So I left and checked into the hotel. Ohhhhhh... This feels like a homecoming. And what a co-incidence, I got the same room where I stayed for a month. So, comfortable with it. Waiting for the match eagerly. It starts at 11pm and I still have like good 5 hours left. So, I went out for a while, just strolled around.  Then went back to the hotel at 8.30pm. Almost time for dinner, so I went to the place where I usually ate while staying in the hotel.

The owner was kind of happy to see me back. We shook hands(Tranditional style here) and then talked for a while.

He: How are you Saheb. (Well, people here call Saheb, intead of Sir or Saab.)

Me: Sirji, I found a house now and I am staying near the office.

He: Thats good then. How is the house.

Me: It's okay. Not bad.

He: How long are you going to stay here?

Me: well, I am here just for a day. Will be going back tomorrow.

He: Okay, that's good. Hope to see you around.

Me: yeah, you will. After I will be coming back time to time.

He: It's nice to know that you will. (With a smile on his face)

Me; Yeah. So, how's the business?

He: It's ood Saheb. People come and eat everyday so there's nothing to complain about.

Me: That's good. After all you serve people with a smile, the food is good. So they ought to come back. Just like I do.

He: That's nice of you to say so. Well, this business brings my food on table, so I need to be sincere while serving people.

Me: I like it Sirji. Well, I wish you all the very best.

By that time the food was there. So, I proceeded with my dinner and left at around 10pm. That was after listening to people talking around me (Well, I do that everytime I go to that hotel!!!) A lot of interesting conversations take place over dinner and it makes for a good entertaintment. In short I enjoy it and always did.

So, back in the hotel now and eagerly waiting for the match. So, just to kill time, I talked on the phone for a while and did some socializing on FB and Twitter.

Finally, the hour is here. The Reds taking on the field. Every time I watch a match, it seems like a new experience for me. It always brings a new sensation. That's what I call the Liverpool Magic, which has been with me ever since I started understanding football. I mean, it's not just about the players, there is something different about Liverpoo. Something that sets them apart from the rest. There is something that makes them so special. I mean, they are really special and I have no words to explain why.

What a match that was. The best from Liverpool I have seen this season. They ran out 4-0 winners leaving me happy and content with my decision to watch this match in a hotel. This was something special. The best moment. Suarez scoring in the last minute of extra time. That was something he really deserved. He was superb as ever. So was the entire team. Proud of them, Proud to be a Red.

That's how the night ended and that's how I slept peacefully with a smile on my face.

Woke up in the afternoon and it's almost time to go home. I really don't wanna go. But that has to be done. I need to pack few things as well. After all I am preparing myself to go home, my real home. So in the evening, I get a text from the "Boss".

Boss: Where are you and what time will you reach?

Me: I am on my way and I will reach at around 6pm.

Boss: That's good. Tonight we will dine at Krishna. It's a Christmas party from your side.

Stunned and speechless now and Ihad no other option. After all, he had the guts to say it and this being my biggest festival, I just couldn't say no.

Me: Okay Sirji. Whatever you say. But we will go out a bit late.

Boss: Okay.

So, I reached home, rested for a while and then set out to eat at night.

Hmmmmmmm... Pretty exciting. Isn't it. Well, you'll read about it more in coming weeks. For now, I will leave you here and will see you very soon. Till then stay safe and take care

Adios!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHMEDABAD DIARIES: CHAPTER VII I'M COMING HOME

After about a week of will I or won't i. Finally, I have decided to go home for Christmas and come back on the 30th or so. Well, as of now that's what the plan is and that is what I have told my manager. Got the train ticket and finally, ready to leave. But honestly, planning it didn't come easy for me. Here's what happened. I was not sure about anything so I did not buy the tickets beforehand. Everything fell into my peon's hand. I gave him the responsibility to get me the tickets and make sure that it doesn't get cancelled or something. As I said, it's a small town, so people know each other. So he does, he know a few people in the railway station and he said he could probably get the tickets done.

My manager told me to go on Saturday and come back on 27th, I however wanted to stay at least till the 28th for some reasons. (Well, we'll get to that a bit later on!!!!) So, I took the ticket for Monday evening and if things go as planned then I'd be home on the 25th at 4am in the morning. Christmas sorted!!! Well, at least as of now. Everything is planned and everyone at home has been told about it. So, I cannot in any case screw this up now. There is however a major glitch. It's Saturday, I am supposed to leave in 2 days and I still don't have the ticket. I was so sure of going, even if I did not have any ticket with me I would have just boarded the train and probably bought ticket inside the train. That's how desperate I was.

I hope you can understand that as well, as this is the first time in my entire life that I was set to miss Christmas. Well, our family hasn't been all these festival crazy types of people but being with family on days like this can make a huge difference. So, I guess I was not prepared to be alone on this day. probably, because I knew if I stay alone things will not be pretty at all and I don't wanna go through this. I mean, I think it's much better option to just avoid it while I can instead of going through this and fussing about everything all a long the way. I mean that is just not right. So, I am gonna do what my heart thinks is the right thing to do. Hope I am doing it right though.

Okay, so it's Sunday and I still don't have the ticket. Growing restless now. Been calling my peon and he's like "Sir!!!! Don't worry the ticket will be in your hands this evening". Okay, I had no other option to believe in it. So I did. Evening came and went by but the ticket never showed up neither did my peon called me or something. Kind of pissed and frustrated about it now, but still keeping my cool. Then he called me at night.

Him: Sir, sorry. Couldn't come today. I will send my brother with the ticket tomorrow.

Me: Okay. By the way, you are sure that we will get the ticket now. The train is for tomorrow.

Him: Sir, don't worry about it. I told you I will get you the ticket. So I will get you.

Me; You better get me the ticket. ( With an uncomfortable smile on my face)

Him: Sir, you just don't worry. Pack your stuff and get all your stuff to the office. Ticket will be in your hands.

Me: Okay. Then. I shall see you tomorrow. Goodnight.

Woke up with all my stuff ready and left for work with my luggage. I decided I am not going to call my peon anymore. If he's serious about the ticket he will just bring it, if not I will just board the train and will find my own way. At around 10am, my peon called and said his brother is going to come to the office to hand me over the tickets. I said okay. After few uneasy hours, he really came with the tickets. Relieved to say the least. Then, he asked me if I needed to be dropped. Of course I needed to, so I said yes!!!!!

Oh, yeah and there is one small glitch. My ticket is from Ratlam to Delhi. So, I will have to buy general ticket from Dahod to Ratlam and sit in the general bogey for 3 hours. Hmmmmmm........ Other days, I would have been a bit annoyed with it. But today, something is better than nothing. So, not complaining about it, maybe because I know the train leaves at 4pm and I will have be be in the general bogey only till 7-8pm. So, it's okay. Pretty excited about it now. And only I know how I spent the next 3-4 hours waiting for 3 pm. Finally, cometh the hour and here's is my man to drop me to the station.

We reached the station at 3.45pm and the train was supposed to come in 10 minutes. One look at the queue at the ticket counter and I was like "Oh my good lord!!!!!!" How will I get a ticket now. It was friggin long. We kind of stood in line for a while then, the announcement about my train and all nervous now. I couldn't even stand properly now, maybe because I knew we would not be able to buy the ticket now. So, I told the guy to just enter the train without ticket and I will figure something out in the train or just pay the fine. He asked me if that was okay with me. I said "YES"!!!!!!!!! I just wanted to get into the train now. So, we entered the train and I sat in my supposed seat.

Hmmmmmm..... Relieved with a sense of happiness in me and I was prepared to face the TC as well. I had planned that I will just pretend to not know anything about it and will just pay the fine or maybe give him some money. The train rolled on and by now, the thoughts of being in Delhi was the only thing in my mind. Two hours passed by and no TC and finally, reached Ratlam at around 6.30 and still no TC. Now I can sit in my seat freely. I friggin have a legit ticket now. Oh and yeah, did I tell you. The train is friggin packed. For the first time in my life I am seeing such a rush inside a train.

A few calls here and there, a lousy dinner in the train and finally its time to sleep. I am supposed to reach Delhi at 3.30am in the morning. So I tried sleeping for a while but couldn't. So, I made few calls at around 12am. After all, it was Christmas day. And slept at around 1am and woke up 3.30 thinking I will reach Delhi soon. But little did I know that due to fog we will not be reaching Delhi any time soon. So, I tried sleeping again but just couldn't and these few hours seemed the longest of my life. Finally, at 8.30am I reached Delhi.

Foggy winter morning, the chill in the air and the feeling of being home. It was just too friggin awesome. Excited? Yes, I friggin am. Can't wait to reach home now. So, I took a taxi and reached home at 9.30am. Mom was waiting at the door for me. Only I know, how I felt when she opened the door for me. This is the place where I belong, finally, a bit late but I am home.

Well, that's it for now. I think I gotta plan my holidays as I have a lot to do in so little time. Will see you very soon. Till then take care and stay safe. Merry Christmas Y'all. bless you.

Adios!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!